Daddy, I Want You to Be Healthy

This remarkable story shows that synergy, where the whole is greater than the sum of the part, comes from life balance.

I had been working every hard on my career. By the time I was forty-five years old, I was quite successful. I was also about sixty pounds overweight, a compulsive eater during times of stress, and one who didn’t have time to exercise regularly because of work. On his  fifth birthday, my son. Logan, gave me a book on healthy living. Inside, his mother had helped him write the following words: “Daddy, for my birthday this year, I want you to be healthy. I want you to be around awhile.” Talk about a punch in the stomach. Ouch.

That plea from my son changed my perspective on my lifestyle completely. The eating and the lack of regular physical exercise weren’t just my individual choice anymore. I saw suddenly that I was creating a very unhealthy legacy for our children. I was modeling for them that one’s body was unimportant; that self-control was unimportant; that the only thing worth working hard for in this life was money and prestige. I realized that my stewardship for my children needs. It also involved providing healthy role models. I had not been doing that.

So I committed myself to being healthy for my children [Habit 1: Be Proactive]. Not to losing weight, but to being healthy. That’s the key for me. My commitment had to be to something that held real value for me. I had tried so many diets and exercise programs before. Normally I would be fine until was simply not enough.

But my children are significant enough. I care enough about them that I can make healthy decisions. I established as a goal for myself that I wanted to be healthy [Habit 2: Begin with the End in Mind]. I wanted to be vital, to have energy to play with my kids after work, to be able to play in the company softball tournament without getting winded on the way to first based. As a way to reach that goal, I implemented a diet and exercise program. The key here is that the diet and exercise program was not the goal. Being healthy for my children was. I decided to share my goal with somebody else who wanted to be healthy. We now work together on a mutually beneficial exercise program. I made sure I set aside time for me to accomplish my goals. I learned to stop working and pay attention to the needs of my body.

It’s been two years since I changed my way of thinking. I don’t struggle anymore to get out of bed. Exercising had almost second nature. I don’t talk myself out of my exercise program like I did at the beginning. Sure, there are still days that I don’t do too well. I’m tired, I have a headache, it’s too hot. Some day, I plain talk myself out of running. But it’s so much easier now for me to get back on track [Habit 3: Put First Things First]. Because I have this larger goal, this greater commitment to somebody I love more than myself, I can get right back on course.

A second benefit to this healthful mind-set is that I believe more than ever that I can be proactive. Getting out of bed early every morning, running to the top of the hill, running is my first 5k race. All of these things motivate me. Day after day, as I exercise, I experience private victories. So now I have this sense of faith, of hope, of belief that I am capable of difficult things. In a way, I had a victim’s mentality before because I was so discouraged, so stressed out that I couldn’t make a difference in the way I lived. Now, I have private victories that buoy me up.

A third benefit to having this larger goal is clearness of mind. I’m getting older. I used to think that getting older meant having to get used to being stiff, sore, tired, achy. But now that I have a much healthier lifestyle, I can see that it wasn’t age that made me feel that way, it was the way I was living. I know now that my head is achy because I ate too much sugar, not because I am forty-seven. My body is adjusted to health. I can use its healthy reactions to help me make decisions about how to live. I have learned you can actually trust principles, the reward of vitality and health s discernible. When that clarity of mind is clouded, I know instantly that I need to get back on track with my eating exercising, and sleep.

Perhaps the greatest lesson I have learned is that my body is intimately connected to the social, mental, and spiritual aspects of my life. That sugar headache I always had didn’t allow me to think clearly. Plus, the clarity of mind that comes after exercising is so beneficial. We identify losing weight as being have gained so far. I’ve never thought so clearly or concisely. Socially, I have benefited as well. Whenever I dieted before, I was always incredibly grumpy, which affected my relationships with my wife, children, and co-workers. I so grumpy because I had this huge have to on my list, which I didn’t have a driving desire to do. Now that I want to be healthy, the decisions to eat correctly and exercise are made more willingly, even joyfully on my part. This lack of internal struggle frees up so much more of my emotional energy to spend on my wife and children.

I never envisioned that a decision to be healthy could have such a dramatic effect on all four areas of my life. I’m not there yet. I’m still working. But I am enjoying the rewards that come from living, exercising, and eating the right way.

When this overweight forty-seven-year-old man tapped onto deeper emotional and spiritual motivations, including the legacy he was leaving his family, he gained control, perspective, willpower, clarity of mind, profound self-awareness, and personal freedom. Among the many lessons this story contains, it particularly shows the power and the fruits of the private victory, How easy it is to say no when we have a burning yes inside.

I ‘ve come to believe that self-mastery is foundational to maintaining good relationships. Appetite control usually precedes and enables emotional and mental control. We also can’t really build strong relationships until we conquer prideful passions. The author of proverbs taught, “He who rules his own spirit is better than he that taketh a city.” Greek wisdom teaches, “Know thyself. Control Thyself. Give thyself.”  

Source: Living The 7 Habits